When I first started this blog, most of my networking was among other opponents of Christian Patriarchy and all that it contains. It just so happens that most of those blogging against these things happen to be religious. I’m not. When I came out on my blog as an atheist, I wasn’t sure what my Christian readers would think. I have been pleased to find that you have accepted me as an ally against Christian Patriarchy regardless of my lack of belief. You have been willing to agree to disagree. Recently, though, the comment thread on one of my posts turned into a debate that centered in part on whether I actually “got” certain aspects of Christian belief. So I’ve decided to take a moment to clarify some things and adjust a few rules with regards to my blog.
Please understand when you read my blog that you are getting the perspective of a twenty something woman who was raised on the line between Fundamentalism and Evangelicalism, then became a conservative Catholic, then a liberal Catholic, then an Agnostic, and then an Atheist. If you are a Christian, you will naturally disagree with posts that tackle religion directly, though not necessarily with posts that tackle elements of fundamentalist religion, homeschooling, patriarchy, or authoritarianism.
Understand that I am not trying to deconvert anyone. I am simply putting my thoughts into words and perhaps along the way providing a perspective some of you may not have heard before. I like to challenge people to think, but I don't have an agenda! And if you don't want to read posts you'll disagree with, you don't have to!
Please don’t try to argue with me over who God is or or over which doctrinal point I am misunderstanding. I've heard your arguments before. You see, I used to be you. In fact, I've said the same things you are saying many times before. I get it. I understand what you are saying, and the argument you are making. I just disagree.
The reality is, I've heard all the arguments many many times, and I have come to the conclusion that there is no God. It's hard for you to fathom, I know, but that's how it is. You are probably sure that I've misunderstood something somewhere along the line and that if you can only set me straight I'll come back to God. You may not be able to fathom understanding the arguments and knowing God and then leaving. You may think that I must have misunderstood something, or must be bitter. Again, I get it. I was you.
If you think I'm wrong, that's fine. Feel free to share your opinion by leaving comments - I enjoy reading those! - just please simply share your thoughts and leave it at that. I don’t need you to argue with me or try to persuade me that I am wrong. If you think this means I have a closed mind, well, feel free to think that! But instead of arguing with me could you instead simply pray that the Holy Spirit will lead me back to Jesus? And if you're that bothered, you can always send me an email!
Just please don't act like I have no idea what I'm talking about. Please don't act like I somehow missed some important point and you can lead me to the Truth. Please don't try to diagnose me with some spiritual problem or tell me where I went wrong. I really don’t need that.
The truth is that I am not uninformed. I studied apologetics as a child and read the Bible every day. I even studied Greek so that I could read the New Testament. After I left fundamentalism I read reams of Christian apologetics and poured over the Bible. I spent hours in prayer and sought to listen to the lead of the Holy Spirit. I studied the writings of the early church fathers and the history of Christianity. Jesus was my best friend. Then, as I left religion entirely, I did even more reading. I read history, archaeology, theology, and science. It's not like I've ever made a religious belief or lack of it lightly. Even today, I continue to find religion fascinating. You see, religion has left a stamp on my life that will never disappear. I continue to study religion in detail, and I am well aware of the wide diversity of Christian belief, and that it has done good as well as evil. I am not ignorant of this and I don't need you to set me straight.
This is my blog, my space. I don't have to prove anything to you. I want this blog to be somewhere where I can freely speak my mind. If you disagree with something I write, feel free to say so - I’m not asking people not to comment, I really do enjoy reading different perspectives! - but please simply state your thoughts and then leave it at that. I have the right to my views, even if you think they’re wrong, just as you have the right to yours.
And really, there are bigger fish to fry than the atheist on the blog next door. To name a few: Patiarchy, Vision Forum, Authoritarianism, Bill Gothard, So Much More and the Botkins, the anti-woman policies of the religious right, and the legalism surrounding courtship, purity, and modesty. So let’s agree to disagree and focus on problems like these!
*applause*
ReplyDeleteEven with differences in beliefs, or lack thereof, there are so many things that we can agree on and find in common. Especially the fight against QF/P.
Thank you for being so open.
Excellent. I think you covered a lot of good points, and covered them well.
ReplyDeleteI usually lurk, but you drew me out of hiding. Don't think that all your readers are religious. I went through a similar journey from a different fundamentalist religion to becoming an atheist myself. I identify with you because we share that transitional experience, and I am glad to learn more about the Christian Patriarchy movement, which I haven't encountered much before. Keep it up!
ReplyDeleteMoreover, let's hope it sinks in with all of your readership.
ReplyDeleteKristen - Thanks, good to know! I appreciate all my readers. :)
ReplyDeleteboomSLANG - My Christian readership has actually been very understanding thus far, pleasantly so, so I have no worries. I just wanted to get this out in the open and set a few new ground rules that I hadn't stated before (such as stating your opinion or views in the comments but not carrying on a debate). So yes, just making sure to maintain a good tone and all. :)
Oh come on Libby, don't be so shy! ;-)
ReplyDeleteI totally respect that you came to who you are today honestly. That's what I respect most about you, your honesty.
That and your good, logical brain. Wonderful attributes to have. =D
Peace and good will, your still Christian (so far!) cyber friend, SS
I'm pretty sure I am not an Atheist, though I don't think that I am very Christian either, so I don't know exactly where that puts me (grins).
ReplyDeleteViolet - If you don't think there is a god, you're an atheist. If you don't think we can know for sure whether or not there's a god, you're an agnostic. If you feel a connection to the divine or to something out there but don't believe in the tenets of any specific religion, then you're simply spiritual. At least, that's how I define those things. :) And hey, the beauty of it is you don't have to pick a label if you don't want one!
ReplyDeleteAgreed. Anyway, I don't believe you, an atheist, and I, a (semi-confused, open-minded, highly-liberal) Christian, actually disagree on very much of a religious nature. ; )
ReplyDeleteFinal Anonymous - "Agreed. Anyway, I don't believe you, an atheist, and I, a (semi-confused, open-minded, highly-liberal) Christian, actually disagree on very much of a religious nature. ; )"
ReplyDeleteProbably not! :)
I should probably introduce myself since I've been reading your blog pretty regularly for the past month or so now. I used to be a devout Catholic as well, but now I lean towards agnosticism. About a year ago, I started learning about fundamentalism, which I find both fascinating and horrifying. Anyway, keep up the good work with your blog!
ReplyDelete-J.B.
@ Violet,
ReplyDeleteHi. Just an aside, and since the subject was raised---if you aren't sure if there's a God, or not, that, yes, technically falls under Agnosticism. However, you can be unsure of something's existence(in this case, God's existence) and that doesn't preclude belief/non-belief in said something. IOW, Agnosticism and Atheism are not mutally exclusive.
Peace
Religion, spirituality, belief, non-belief, and so on...are only as complicated as we, as individuals, make them.
ReplyDeleteI'm a strong believer in the concept of "live and let live", myself.
I completely see where you are coming from. I haven't really "come out" to anyone I know about my lack of belief and those kinds of comments are part of what scares me about talking about it.
ReplyDelete"I'm a strong believer in the concept of 'live and let live', myself." ~ Sheena
ReplyDeleteOh, me, too. Unfortunately, there's at least one religion that actually encourages its adherents to recruit new people to their way of thinking. When/if this is done under threat of bodily harm for non-compliance, this hardly represents a "live and let live" attitude, IMO. In fact, I'd say it's nothing less than emotional terrorism.
As an Agnostic who is also an Atheist, I don't think it's unreasonable to stand up against this type of mentality.
Well said.
ReplyDeleteThis is your space, and we come here because we want to hear what you have to say. Period. The end.
I'm glad you're covering this now, since people, sometimes even very well-intentioned ones, forget that unless they've walked in your shoes, they can't know exactly what you've been through(and thus the choices that have led you to where you are today).
I'm a reformed evangelical-turned-atheist, too and I appreciate your writing so much! I added you to my blog roll because this has become one of my favorite blogs!
ReplyDeleteAnother former christian, now agnostic/atheist blog follower here - was raised fairly fundamental and definately evangelical - would love to copy this post and send it to certain well meaning people in my life :0) Very much describes my journey away from 'faith' though i probably spent longer in the very liberal christian phase - enjoying your writing as usual...
ReplyDeleteChatterbox - "would love to copy this post and send it to certain well meaning people in my life :0)"
ReplyDeleteFeel free! I'm glad this piece spoke to you. :)
I read your blog because I find your writing interesting and your experience fascinating--I was raised in an extremely liberal and liberating Christian family, and ended up a pantheistic Pagan and Unitarian Universalist, because I thought the box was still too small for what we want divinity to be for us...
ReplyDeleteLike you, I share the dislike of the patronizing tone of some individuals that say "if only...you must not have understood..." etc, etc...but you said it much better than I could!
As a nurse I will pray with you if you wish.
ReplyDeleteIf your Muslim I will make sure that your bed faces Mecca.
If your Hindi I will help you with your shrine if you wish.
My goal as a nurse is to assist with the religion preferred by my clients.
My clients should never, ever know what religion I may or may not believe in.
I wish the really fundamentalist Christians would not attempt to use a nursing job as a recruitment opportunity.